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  • Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Advice, antics, tender moments, and tough love. Join gay uncle Ben Palacios and gay uncle, Tom Truss, in their hit new podcast about relationships and queer culture. his Share your feedback for a chance to meet Ben and Tommy! LATEST EPISODE: 26. A VERY COVID CHRISTMAS 00:00 / 01:04 Tags # # # # # # COVID HIV Testing Holidays Christmas NewYears Ben and Tommy travel to Kentucky for family Christmas and get tested for Covid, and explore the similarities between COVID and HIV. Ben shares a memory of a previous family Christmas, which gives Tommy a chance to see himself from Ben’s 11-yr-old perspective. The Guncles battle head-to-head with Christmas Carols (why are there so many!?) and help a listener celebrate a solo New Year’s Eve. ​ Read more. Share RECENT EPISODES 25. RELATIONSHIP REGRETS AND HOMO-NO-PHOBIA Ben and Tommy get tested for Covid, go head-to-head in a Christmas Carol battle, and help a listener celebrate a solo New Year’s Eve. 24. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE? GAY MOVIES WITH STRAIGHT ACTORS? Gay romantic movies, how long to wait before sex, and how to create an LGBT+ friendly household for your kids. 23. ANTHONY MEINDL: OUR FAVORITE HOLLYWOOD GUNCLE Writer, filmmaker, and acting coach Anthony Meidl joins The Guncles to answer listener questions, play Generation Gap and discuss his new book and award-winning film. LISTEN & SUBSCRIBE

  • Episode 25 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 25. RELATIONSHIP REGRETS AND HOMO-NO-PHOBIA 00:00 / 01:04 Tags # # # # # # # # # # # Fairytales HateCrimes Prejudice Regrets Homophobia Weed Neighbors Drag Exes Mexico MomentOfCulture Share The Guncles share past relationship regrets… Was Ben too pushy? Was Tommy not pushy enough? One listener seeks advice on how to break it to her neighbors that their weed smoking bothers her. Another listener asks a tricky question, “Who is subject to more prejudice, gay men or lesbians?” What does a drag party, the number 41, and the son-in-law of a Mexican dictator have in common? Our “Moment of Culture” reveals that on November 17, 1901, police raided a private house party in Mexico City. What they uncovered would scandalize the city and realign notions of sexuality, gender and class in Mexico for generations. Share your feedback for a chance to meet Ben and Tommy! ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ Places to anonymously report acts of prejudice and violence 24/7 : 1-212-714-1141 Anti Violence Project Hotline Website: Anti-Violence Project Website: and Hotline: 1-888-843-4564 LGBT National Help Center National Youth Talkline: 1-800-246-7743 – serves transgender and gender nonconforming survivors of domestic and sexual violence and provides to local counselors FORGE referrals National Sexual Assault Hotline 1-800-656-4673 – Can also refer you to a local rape crisis center Website: – serves LGBTQ, poly, and kink/BDSM survivors of abuse. Bilingual hotline: 1-617-742-4911 The Network La Red INFO ABOUT CRIMES AND PREJUDICE AGAINST LGBTQ+ PEOPLE Article: Definitions: Homophobia, Heterosexism, and Sexual Prejudice Article: Predictors of Attitudes Toward Gay Men and Lesbian Women in 23 Countries FBI statistics on LGBTQ hate crimes: Sexuality Website: National Advocacy of Anti-Violence Programs Moment of Culture History.com: 41 Has a Secret Meaning in Mexico, Thanks to a Queer Underground Ball Film trailer: El Baile de los 41 Americas Quarterly: The Queer Dance Party That Changed Mexico

  • Episode 26 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode 26. A VERY COVID CHRISTMAS 00:00 / 01:04 Tags # # # # # # COVID HIV Testing Holidays Christmas NewYears Ben and Tommy travel to Kentucky for family Christmas and get tested for Covid, and explore the similarities between COVID and HIV. Ben shares a memory of a previous family Christmas, which gives Tommy a chance to see himself from Ben’s 11-yr-old perspective. The Guncles battle head-to-head with Christmas Carols (why are there so many!?) and help a listener celebrate a solo New Year’s Eve. Share Share your feedback for a chance to meet Ben and Tommy! ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ CDC: COVID demographics HIV.gov: HIV demographics

  • Episode 24 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 24. SEX ON THE FIRST DATE? GAY MOVIES WITH STRAIGHT ACTORS? 00:00 / 01:04 Tags # # # # # # # # Fairytales Parenting Sex Dating Disney NewYears GayMovies GayRomComs The Guncles share New Year’s traditions and give a listener advice on how to create an LGBTQ inclusive household for her newborn. A discussing about gay romance movies becomes a debate about whether it’s acceptable for straight actors to play LGBTQ+ characters in movies like Brokeback Mountain and Call Me By Your Name. The game “Workshop, Greenlight, Blacklist” takes a turn into figuring out when to have sex while dating. Share Share your feedback for a chance to meet Ben and Tommy! ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ New Year’s traditions around the world: Article from Invaluable The Guncles favorite LGBTQ Romance movies: Review and trailer of Saturday Church Review and trailer of Call Me By Your Name Review and trailer of God’s Own Country Trailer for Interview With a Vampire Ben’s LGBTQ+ Sci-Fi film, Surfer’s Paradise Queer Streaming Network Revry Book: , by Benjamin Alire Sáenz Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe Book: , by Casey McQuiston Red, White, and Royal Blue

  • Episodes | Ask Your Gay Uncle

    Ben and Tommy get tested for Covid, go head-to-head in a Christmas Carol battle, and help a listener celebrate a solo New Year’s Eve. 26. A Very COVID Christmas The Guncles share past relationship regrets, and answer a listener question regarding who receives more prejudice, gay men or lesbians. Ben’s “Moment of Culture” begins at a Mexican drag party in 1901… 25. Relationship Regrets and Homo-NO-phobia Gay romantic movies, how long to wait before sex, and how to create an LGBT+ friendly household for your kids. 24. Sex on the First Date? Gay Movies with Straight Actors? Writer, filmmaker, and acting coach Anthony Meidl joins The Guncles to answer listener questions, play Generation Gap and discuss his new book and award-winning film. 23. Anthony Meindl: Our Favorite Hollywood Guncle The Guncles discuss their first crushes. Tommy helps Ben break through the friendzone while Ben helps Tommy craft a flirty text. In “The Generation Gap” they test each other’s knowledge of cartoons. 22. Cartoons, Crushes, and Breaking the Friendzone Tommy interviews Ben's sisters. 21. Sisters Tell All, part 2: Ben Ben interviews Tommy’s sisters. 20. Sisters Tell All, part 1: Tommy The Guncles answer three listener questions: Can you be not gay enough? How to connect with LGBTQ+ people at college and are women who watch gay porn fetishists? 19. Experimenting in College and Women Who Watch Gay Porn The Guncles celebrate gay civil rights hero Bayard Rustin and interview his long time partner Walter Naegle. 18. The Civil Rights Hero You Weren’t Taught About In History: Bayard Rustin, and his partner Walter Naegle The Guncles are joined by Zachary Zane, sex columnist for Men’s Health and self-proclaimed “ethical manwhore." 17. ‘Sexpert’ Zachary Zane on Bisexuality, Bottoming, and Masc4Masc Thirteen stories about coming out, as told by our listeners. 16. It's National Coming Out Day!!! The Guncles answer a series of questions with two common themes: Daddies and difficult conversations. 15. Daddies, Ultimatums, and the word "Faggot" The Guncles give advice to a closeted Christian who’s considering remaining in the closet permanently. Five LGBTQ+ guests from five different religions share how they reconcile their faith with their sexuality. 14. Religion, part 2: Have your Faith and Eat It Too How do you reconcile being Christian with being gay? Father Rico Avila joins The Guncles to answer this difficult question, and shares his outrageous coming out story. 13. Religion, part 1: Gay and Christian? Father Rico Avila Breaks the Bread Ben and Tommy dive into the drama of the 1973 Gay Pride rally. The Guncles discuss the growing prevalence of “Golden Gays” and advise a newly-out 52 year old man how to catch up on “missed gay experiences.” 12. Golden Gays, Coming Out Late, and The Battle of the Pride 1973 Tommy and Ben interview LGBTQ+ historian Dr. Eric Cervini about his New York Times best selling book, . The Guncles check in on advice they gave each other in previous episodes, and discuss why it’s so scary to make the first move! The Deviant’s War: The Homosexual vs. The United States of America 11. Shoulder Demons, Sexual Deviants, and Dr. Eric Cervini 10. The Body Episode The guncles answer a series of questions about body and body image. Tommy presents Mexican-American lesbian photographer Laura Aguilar. 9. Gay Uncle's Day, Simon Dunn, and Badass Bitches The guncles interview hunky Australian Rugby and Bobsled star, Simon Dunn, about being an out pro-athlete and a gay uncle. Tommy and Ben quiz each other on iconic TV/cinema from their childhood. 8. Dating Apps, OnlyFans, and Meeting the Parents Is it safe to subscribe to OnlyFans? How do you get solo time with your lover when their friends keep getting in the way? Ben wants advice on bringing someone home to meet the family. 7. The Porn Episode Tommy and Ben go down the porn rabbit-hole. Special guest Bruce Merkle presents Guncle of The Week, legendary Hollywood film director George Cukor. 6. Sissies, Threesomes, and Puppies Why are there so many gay men in the arts? Tommy and Ben examine the Generation Gap and discuss the connotations of language surrounding sexuality. Tommy and Ben discuss the details of PrEP. The guncles also tackle friends that don't get along, friends that fall in love with friends, and friends that have a bone to pick. 5. PrEP, Lies, and Friends (not the sitcom) Bonus: Deep Dive with Tommy and Ben In this extended "Guncle-to-Guncle," Tommy and Ben share some deeply personal stories. 4. Magic Carpets and White Patriarchy How can we let in the feeling of love? How do gay white men benefit from the Patriarchy? What do the Guncles want for the next generation of Guncles? 3. Homos in the Arts and the Generation Gap Why are there so many gay men in the arts? Tommy and Ben examine the depths of the Generation Gap. 2. DMs, Radical Faeries, and Burying the Hatchet Ben gets a lesson about the Radical Faeries. Tommy gets a lesson about DMs. Both uncles explore ways to forgive and move on. Bonus: Stonewall, F4, and David Scott A bonus track commemorating the Stonewall Riots. Hear David Scott, a regular at the Stonewall Inn, share his firsthand description of those momentous nights. 1. Shawn Mendes, Gay Tribalism, and Multiple Orgasms How do you tell your siblings that their kids might be LGBTQ? How do you stop falling in love with unavailable people? What's a rhombus? Trailer: Introducing Ask Your Gay Uncle Gay uncles Ben Palacios & Tom Truss introduce their new podcast of advice, antics, tender moments, and tough love.

  • Episode 20 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 20. SISTERS TELL ALL, PART 1: TOMMY 00:00 / 01:04 Ben interviews Tommy’s sisters, Tori and Ann, to get the scoop on what it was like growing up with Tommy. We hear about the infamous “letter” where Tommy came out to his family, his parents’ attempts to shield him from homosexuality, and some darker moments in Tommy’s life. Tags #SexAddiction #Sex #Addiction #Family #ComingOut Share ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ by Larisa FastHorse (starring Tommy!) “The Thanksgiving Play” Streaming online from Nov 19-22, 2020. Tickets here. Addiction Resources: Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration: 1-800-662-HELP (4357) 24/7 hotline Extensive list of 12 step recovery groups Sex Love Addicts Anonymous Sex Addicts Anonymous Narcotics Anonymous Alcoholics Anonymous Anorexia and Bulimia Anonymous

  • Episode 18 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 18. THE CIVIL RIGHTS HERO YOU WEREN'T TAUGHT ABOUT IN HISTORY: BAYARD RUSTIN, AND HIS PARTNER WALTER NAEGLE 00:00 / 01:04 Tags #BayardRustin #WalterNaegle #LGBTQHistoryMonth #CivilRights #BlackLivesMatter #MLK Share The Guncles celebrate gay civil rights hero Bayard Rustin and interview his long time partner Walter Naegle about Bayard’s activism, the importance of nonviolent protesting, and how the couple used adoption in the absence of legal gay marriage. ​ Bayard Rustin was born in 1912 and had his first fight for social justice at age 16 when he was arrested for sitting in the white section of a movie theatre. He continued that fearless dedication for social justice and equality throughout his life until he died in 1987 while on a humanitarian mission in Haiti. ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ documentary (mentioned by Walter Naegle) “Cured” by Thad Morgan – History.com Why MLK's Right-Hand Man, Bayard Rustin, Was Nearly Written Out of History An extensive article about Bayard Rustin, “Brother Outsider” (Bayard Rustin documentary) – and trailer full documentary An extensive article about Bayard Rustin as an LGBTQ civil rights activist, Honoring an Unsung LGBTQ Hero: Bayard Rustin – FamilyEquality.org by Rev. Barber Eulogy for Bayard Rustin Bayard Rustin singing spirituals

  • Episode 22 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 22. CARTOONS, CRUSHES, AND BREAKING THE FRIENDZONE 00:00 / 01:04 Tags #Crushes #Tinder #Cartoons #Friendzone #SarahMcBride #Trans #Flirting #GenerationGap A listener wants to know about The Guncles’ first crushes so they spill the beans. In “Guncle to Guncle,” Tommy helps Ben figure out how to get some action in Mexico while Ben helps Tommy rekindle a Tinder flame. In “The Generation Gap,” the Guncles test each other’s knowledge of cartoons from their respective childhoods. LGBT Hero of the Week is trailblazer Sarah McBride, the first trans person elected to the Senate and the highest ranking trans official in the United States. Share ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ Senator Sarah McBride’s Ted Talk: “Gender Assigned To Us At Birth Should Not Dictate Who We Are” BBC: Sarah McBride to be the first trans state senator ​

  • Episode 21 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 21. SISTERS TELL ALL, PART 2: BEN 00:00 / 01:04 Tommy interviews Ben’s sisters, Mariana and Christina, to get the lowdown on what it was like growing up with Ben. We hear about Barbies, cooking fiascos, and the changes that they’ve seen in Ben over the years. We also get their account of Ben’s coming out... and why the Grandparents don’t know yet. Tags #College #Family #ComingOut Share ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ by Larisa FastHorse (starring Tommy!) “The Thanksgiving Play” Streaming online from Nov 19-22, 2020. Tickets here.

  • Episode 19 | Ask Your Gay Uncle Podcast

    Previous Episode Previous Episode 19. EXPERIMENTING IN COLLEGE AND WOMEN WHO WATCH GAY PORN 00:00 / 01:04 Tags #GayPorn #Fetish #DragRace #GayCulture #ComingOut #Dates #Romance #College #VassarCollege #RadicalFaeries #RobynOchs #Cruising #BathroomSex #TeaRooms The Guncles answer three listener questions. One listener asks about friends and dates who’ve told him he’s “not gay enough” for not ascribing to certain aspects of gay culture. A straight female listener wonders if her affinity for gay porn is fetishizing or oppresive to gay men. Last, a Vassar College student wants to know how to connect with other LGBTQ+ folks at school. Ben and Tommy share their own stories of experimenting in college. Share ​ MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE ​ ​ ​ Guncle of the Week: bisexual activist Robyn Ochs

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© 2020 Ask Your Gay Uncle

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To ask Tommy & Ben a question for the show, call (512) 981-7332.
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